Sniffing The Touchline #navbar-iframe { display:block } function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener("load", function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } skip to main | skip to sidebarSniffing The Touchlineblowing it up the arse of the beautiful game.....The Shoes Maketh the Man Often I have thought that the one thing holding me back from going pro was not having the right pair of Astroturf shoes. Now however, I think my time has come because finally I have got an awesome pair of Adidas F30.8 indoors to stroll around in majestically while I carve open many a hapless opposition team. There are made by using science, and that involves the grafting of a lightweight microfiber synthetic material by Eastern European virgins for a comfortable fit. That’s why these beauties are so prestigious. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find an Eastern European virgin these days? Finally, here’s the sexy part: not only do they look like NASA discovered them, but they also have a handy Agion antimicrobial lining to limit bacterial and fungal growth. Aesthetics – 9 / 10 Opinion-dividing to say the least…many of my male friends think they’re a bit “garish,” but they all have appalling dress senses anyway, so their collective opinion is void. Chicks dig ‘em though, and most importantly so does the person giving the final rating, i.e. me  Touch – 9 / 10 These shoes have a nice little fold-over tongue feature, which goes over the laces and increases proper usable kicking surface. So, if unlike me you aren’t amazing at football, you won’t have to middle all your passes and shots quite as well to get a favourable outcome. Also if you struggle with laces generally, the velcro’s got you covered. Scoring ability – 1 / 10 Alas it was a poor week generally for Boafista, and I myself am in the midst or a relatively barren scoring spell. This is not because I have lost it though. It is in fact more reflective of the responsible Claude Makalele-esque water-carrying job I am doing at the back. How much of a kicking did I get wearing them – 8 / 10 Opposition meatheads took exception to the stylish translucent blue panelling along the sides of the shoes and thus tried to break my ankles because of it. Do not let this put you off however; the more people try and blood-thirstedly kick you, the easier it is to nutmeg them. Fact. Big thanks go out to the kind folks over at SoccerPro.com for sending us these delightful shoes to try out. They’re good folks over there, and provide top quality gear whether you want shirts, balls or shoes. They definitely didn’t pay us to say that. Posted bychalovesmonkeysat4:50 PM0comments Labels:boafista,kitMake-a-Wish Foundation A couple of years back during the 2006 World Cup, you might remember Carlsberg running a great little advert about the best pub football team in the world. They roped in Sir Bobby Robson to manage the outfit, and opted for a tidy little starting line up of Peter Shilton, Des Walker, Bryan Robson, Stuart Pearce, Chris Waddle, Peter Beardsley, Peter Reid, Terry Butcher, Alan Ball, Jack Charlton and Bobby Charlton. Sure it was pure fantasy, but bizarrely word has reached the press this week that it might not be that far away from actually happening, with a team made up entirely of former FA Cup winners being put together to enter next year’s competition. Most pleasingly, Gazza is being touted as one of the still-unnamed team’s stars. The plan is to have the legends join a non-league side but only play during the team’s FA Cup campaign. The organizers of the Legends football series, Toast Events, are arranging players as we speak, with a view to raise plenty of wonga for charity in the process. Other names already mentioned are Ray Parlour, Lee Sharpe, Bryan Robson, Dave Beasant, Graeme Le Saux and Roberto di Matteo, with assurances made that “it will be a serious venture…(not) a laughing stock.” Imagine lining up for your local Sunday league team on a sunny afternoon next July, and rather than one of the usual selection of overweight boozers to mark, you’ve got Gazza. Ok, all jokes aside, this is exactly the kind of thing he needs to focus on, so please let this happen and let’s save our Gazza!Posted bychalovesmonkeysat9:10 AM0commentsLabels:fa cup,gazzaWarning: Contains a Tenuous Analogy The world of wannabe WAGs / glamour models is apparently a fickle one. Just days after the office party in honour of Danielle Lloyd and Chantelle Houghton becoming official BFFs, they have fallen out spectacularly according to the usual gossip channels. The big-chested Celebrity Big Brother winner was on the receiving end of Lloyd’s sharp tongue for dating her fantastically desirable ex, the irrepressible Jermain Defoe. So yet again the pint-sized Portsmouth striker has hot girls fighting over him. It just isn’t fair. Anyway, Lloyd was overheard at London’s Embassy Club mumbling this somewhat oblique insult: “If Jermain wants her, he’s welcome to her. She’s not like me — she’s like Woolworths.” Interesting analogy there Danielle, but I’m not quite sure it works. You see, both Ms Lloyd and Ms Houghton are pretty cheap composites of various plastic items, so I’m not quite sure what that makes Lloyd if Houghton is “Woolworths.” Costcutters maybe? I don’t know. An unnamed insider helpfully clarified though: “Imitation is the highest form of flattery. So Dan is entertained by Chantelle’s style-stalking. She got a boob job, started the glamour modeling, and began hanging out with Danielle’s friends at her favourite nightclubs.” So far, so impressively descriptive and egotistical. “But there’s only one Danielle Lloyd, and she’s amused that her ex has pulled the Woolworths version of herself,” the source concluded smugly. I still don’t get it. In case you care, Lloyd was out celebrating the 21st birthday of former Big Brother girl Chanelle Hayes. You know, the one that thinks she’s Victoria Beckham. Suffice to say, it was a truly magical night. Posted bychalovesmonkeysat8:57 AM0commentsLabels:BFFs,tittle-tattle,who needs wags,woolies“But He Called My Son a Nonce!” Ok I’ll just get the shit pun out of the way now: two teammates from Hull City brawled with each other in a casino last week, “like snarling animals.” Hull are of course nicknamed the Tigers. Tigers snarl, and also behave like animals. Sometimes I despair.Anyway, the on-loan star Marlon King is said to have head-butted fellow striker (and STT messiah) Dean Windass in a rumble that ended with the pair having to be pulled apart by other Hull players. Windass was left with a bloody nose, and King reportedly insulted the staff before bizarrely pretending his £19,000 watch had been stolen. And where did all this go down you might ask? Well the epicentre of all things cultural and decadent, Scarborough’s Opera House Casino.A mysterious tipster said the barney followed “weeks of simmering tension” between the two, as the aging Windass got more and more pissed off that King was starting ahead of him, despite promises being made to him in the off-season that he would feature in the Premier League. An actual eye-witness said: “Windass appeared to say something to King that had him raging like a bull. King was shouting, ‘You bastard. Wait until I tell my boy what you said.’” Windass then reportedly shouted back: “It was a joke. You know fuck all about anything.” Sounds pretty exciting doesn’t it folks? As things started to get a bit tasty, “blood and drinks were sent flying,” the witness said. “It was embarrassing. They were like snarling animals.” Team-mates eventually pulled the pair apart and the players were allowed to stay after promising there would be no more trouble. This was when King then tried to pretend his expensive watch had been pinched, even though: “staff clearly saw him put it in his own pocket,” according to this anonymous font of knowledge. Richard Koval-Meth, gaming manager of the casino in North Yorks, offered this concise summation: “There was a fracas, but it only lasted a minute or two.” He also confirmed that the missing watch was luckily found in King’s pocket. Other fights we’d like to see: John Hartson vs Duncan Ferguson (weapons free), Ashley Cole vs Theo Woolcott, Robbie Savage vs David Ginola, Joey Barton vs A Rabid Bear, and finally, Cheryl Tweedy vs A Strip-club PolePosted bychalovesmonkeysat8:53 AM0commentsLabels:a pig fat slice of Hull,gambling,windassCoining It In You might’ve heard that last week Chelsea were dumped out of the Carling Cup by lowly Burnley, and on penalties no less. To be frank, I can’t be bothered to crunch the numbers, but I’m guessing that most of the Chelsea team earn more in a week than the Burnley squad put together earn in a year or something. I’m sure the game was riveting, but the highlight was Didier Drogba returning to form and being a complete prick. Just after he opened the scoring, Diddles celebrated in front of placid group of Burnley fans and families, when a coin jumped out of someone’s pocket and fell at the Chelsea striker’s feet. He immediately took umbridge at this, picking up the coin and hurling it straight at an old lady, before then laughing and giving her the finger. Drogba offered this perfectly reasonable explanation: “I tried to celebrate the goal and I received some things at me. The big mistake I did was to throw it back so if someone was hurt I just want to apologise. This is not something I should show and I want to apologise. It was an incident in the heat of the moment and I regret it. It was just a mistake and nothing more.”Those of you with keen memories will remember Liverpool defender Jamie Carragher receiving a three-game ban back in 2002 after throwing a coin back at Arsenal fans. Back when he was good, and at Leeds, Alan Smith also received a similar sentence for hurling a bottle at Manchester United fans. Thanks to The Sun by the way for informing us that under no circumstances are we to use their exclusive photos.Posted bychalovesmonkeysat8:47 AM0commentsLabels:coins,Doggy StyleThe Gamest Lad The best thing about football violence is the drug / alcohol-induced numbness that makes literally anything that moves a target. Few human experiences can top that feeling when you finish a bottle of Buckfast, do a couple of rails of blow, and then hurl yourself head-first through a pub window just to punch a kid who’s wearing an opposing team’s shirt. Every so often though, a hooligan comes along though who takes the bar and just hoists it so high that satellites have to adjust their orbits. Meet Shaun Allen. He’s a Stoke City fan who was today banned from attending any league matches for three years after he punched a police horse. Yes that’s right, he actually punched a horse. This incident went down on the opening day of the season, when his beloved Potters were on the road at the Reebok stadium. Word on the street is that Allen was with a group of about 15 other Stoke fans who were drinking outside the stadium, when a police officer unreasonably tried to confiscate a can off Allen and asked the group to move on. Not being some kind of ice cream, Allen obviously became abusive, and lashed out at the nearest thing to him, which happened to be a huge horse. He has subsequently pleaded guilty to causing harassment, alarm and distress, leading to a fine of £200. Bizarrely he was also ordered to pay £100 legal costs and a £15 victim surcharge to the horse. I’m sorry but what exactly is a horse going to do with £15? Put a couple of cheeky bets on? Spend a couple of hours in Browns? NO! BECAUSE HE IS A HORSE. HE HAS HOOFS. Thanks to With Leather for the heads up on this. Sterling work fellas. Posted bychalovesmonkeysat6:26 PM0commentsLabels:hooligans,horse abuse,stokeGameweek 12 – Misanthrope Happy midweek then chaps and chapettes, and despite an awful weekend weather-wise, a good time was had by all. The two pace-setters Chelsea and Liverpool enjoyed a successful couple of hours in the office, breezing past their opposition without really breaking sweat. Both Nicolas Anelka and Robbie Keane bagged a brace each, and looked in fine form as Blackburn and West Brom crumbled appropriately. Manchester City and Aston Villa continue to infuriate, both losing in pretty flat performances to Spurs and Middlesbrough respectively. Everton meanwhile seem to be putting it together at last, with a rejuvenated Louis Saha netting twice against a West Ham side who are surely in real trouble this season. Heading to the North-East then, and poor times were had by both Sunderland and Newcastle to keep them rooted in the relegation scrap. Finally, the two glamour games this weekend saw Hull play Bolton, and Wigan host Stoke. Predictably there was just a goal across both matches, with Bolton sneaking three points away from the KC Stadium, while dejected Wigan fans apparently sat through literally the worst 90 minutes the Premier League has seen for quite some time. I’d comment further but I just couldn’t face watching the ‘highlights.’ Game of the Week – Arsenal vs Manchester United The BIG game this weekend was of course in North London, as two of the major superpowers sized each other for the first time this year. Going into the match, Manchester United were starting to look pretty slick after a shaky start to the season, while Arsenal were apparently on the ropes already after a couple of pretty tepid performances to say the least. However, in the rare case of a big-four clash actually being open and exciting, Saturday lunchtime at the Emirates was a pretty captivating affair. There was a breakneck tempo for 90 minutes, and enough end-to-end action for it to have finished 4 – 4 on another day, but the Gunners just edged it thanks to a couple of nicely-taken Samir Nasri goals. Player of the Week – Jussi Jaaskelainen It’s rare for a keeper to get this award but Jaaskelainen just edges it this week over a brace-scoring Robbie Keane. The giant Finn was in absolutely inspired form as Bolton further helped to burst the Hull bubble, with a scrappy one-goal win at the KC Stadium. The unpronouncably-named keeper made a string of superb saves in the face of a late Tigers fight-back, with the pick being a double-save where he first parried Marlon King’s effort before pushing clear the loose ball as Geovanni swooped. Trick of the Week – Scott Parker Scott Parker always respect around our office for looking commendably like a World War II fighter pilot, however this weekend he proved he can play a bit too. In the build-up to Jack Collison’s opener at Upton Park, he delightfully backheeled the ball and wrong-footed the entire Everton defence. Kudos Mr Parker, kudos. Goal of the Week – Rafael Silva I don’t know much about Rafael, but I think he’s quite sweet. He also has ace hair. Anyway, after coming on for the ailing Gary Neville, the young Brazilian was excellent both in defence and attack, netting this cracking volley with five minutes left on the clock to worry the Arsenal faithful as they clock-watched. Worst Goal of the Week – Nicolas Anelka Ok, so Anelka’s second was very nicely taken, but this first goal was absolutely hilarious. Jose Boswinga unleashed one of the most speculative efforts of the season so far, but his 4o-yard drive swerved straight into Anelka’s groin and subsequently wrong-footed Paul Robinson in the Blackburn goal. Not sure what ‘they all count’ in French is, answers on a postcard please. Fashion Statement of the Week – Jose BosingwaI think Boswinga’s pretty cool, in a street-kid-done-good kind of way, but he rapidly plummeted in my estimation this weekend after being snapped playing on Sunday with surgical gloves over his normal wooly gloves. Why, you might ask. Well, to make sure his warm Adidas gloves stayed fresh and dry of course! What a lady. Good-to-have-you-back-playing-again Moment of the Week – Steve SidwellDepending on who you talk to, Steve Sidwell is either unlucky or a complete prick. Regardless of your opinion on his various transfer sagas, I guess it was good to see him starting a game for Villa this weekend after quite a long lay-off with a broken arm. He marked his debut with a goal, sure, but then unfortunately underlined it by gifting Middlesbrough a last minute winner, when his misplaced pass played in Tuncay expertly to slot past Friedel. Stick to bench-warming methinks. Special Mention of the Week – Darren BentHe’s got a lot of stick over the last couple of years but it seems that finally Darren Bent is finally finding his scoring boots for Tottenham. Following a superb hat-trick last week against Dynamo Zagreb, Bent once again netted for Spurs as the Harry Redknapp show keeps on rolling. Both goals were sweet against Manchester City, but the first was especially well-taken. £16million well spent? We’re not quite there yet, but still… Posted bychalovesmonkeysat2:13 PM0commentsLabels:2 ginger 2 b tatz,barnets,weekly roundupPointed Stick Premier League new boys Stoke City are on the public’s radar for two main reasons: making Arsene Wenger cry; and delivering the most dangerous set-pieces in the league. The man behind these incredible throw-ins is of course Rory Delap, and now 12 games deep in the season, he is responsible for seven of the Potters’ goals. The human sling-shot has now amazingly been headhunted to compete as a javelin thrower in the 2012 London Olympics by Athletics Ireland. The Republic of Ireland international was a schoolboy javelin champ, but bizarrely chose to pursue a career in football instead…has he not seen the javelin WAGs?? Anyway, the world record is just shy of 100 metres, but when you consider that Delap’s longest throw this season is more than 45 metres with a considerably less aerodynamic object, maybe the midfielder is yet to find his true calling. Mary Coghlan, head of Athletics Ireland, said: “We don’t have any javelin throwers competing at the World Championships next year so of course we would welcome him. To reach the acquired standard would be extremely difficult but nothing is impossible. Certainly, if he wanted to try and throw the javelin for Ireland we would be more than delighted to have him.” A member of the Olympic Council of Ireland offered this insightful comment: “Rory certainly has one hell of an arm on him!” We assume he was drunk. Now I don’t know about you, but whenever I think of javelins, the only mental picture I get is that scene from 999 years ago when some schoolkid slipped and fell on a javelin. That was pretty hardcore. Posted bychalovesmonkeysat6:30 PM0commentsLabels:a point-ed stick,long throws,who needs wagsWhii Amii, Whii?? As much as the press and the general public complain when Cristiano Ronaldo gets caught fingering five hookers simultaneously in the back of his Bugatti Veyron, we all secretly know that in his position we’d be doing exactly the same thing on a Tuesday morning. You see, he’s probably the best footballer in the world, so has kind of earned the ridiculously fantastical life that he finds himself living day-to-day. What really grinds people’s gears though is when remarkably average players, who seem to have to passion or commitment to the game, end up earning almost as much money as the Portuguese star, and living a similarly breast-covered existence. Case in point: Jermaine Pennant. A player who has rarely shown any ambition, and has yet spun out a pretty successful career for himself, including a Champions League Final appearance. What makes it worse though is that he has also dated many busty beauties, including the quite delectable Jennifer Metcalfe, and is now engaged to cracking topless model Amii Grove. Don’t let the lobotomised spelling of ‘Amy’ put you off, because she is all sorts of low-self-esteem-but-hot wrapped up in a fine 32D package. According to The Sun, the 23-year-old, exclaimed “Yes!” when the Liverpool bench-warmer, who she has dated for nearly two years now, got down on one knee and presented her with a diamond ring this past weekend. “I’m so happy,” she dribbled. “We haven’t set a date because of hectic work schedules, but I want it to be sooner rather than later. He’s the man of my dreams.” Those of you with either keen memories or literally no life will remember that just over a year ago, Grove stormed out of the relationship after she caught Pennant cheating on her by checking their mansion’s CCTV camera. After spotting lipstick on a wine glass, the surprisingly-resourceful Grove did a little bit of detective work: “Sure enough the tape showed a pretty brunette walking into our bedroom with Jermaine. I could see the moment they turned the light off and burst into tears.” This prompted her to trash £200,000 of his designer clothes at the time, but apparently she has a ridiculously short memory. If only I could find a topless model who’s dreams involve me being a promiscuous and arrogant little shit… Posted bychalovesmonkeysat6:27 PM0commentsLabels:tittle-tattleGameweek 11 – The Fallen Greetings faithful following and a somewhat delayed weekend review, as is becoming the custom these days unfortunately. But it is worth reading, I assure you!Anyway, plenty of goals, shocks and last-minute drama this week as the league has been once again been given an all-mighty shake. We start as ever with the top dogs, and defending champions Manchester United appeared to be giving new boys Hull a lesson in class with an hour on the clock, leading 4 – 1, before the ever-spirited Tigers fought back to get within touch distance of an equaliser before the final whistle blew. No such trouble for Chelsea though, who continued their imperious form against a Sunderland side who were frankly awful, for the second time in four days. Anelka bagged a hat-trick without actually doing anything, and in all honesty 5 – 0 flattered Sunderland.Arsenal’s bad week continued as well though, with Arsene Wenger’s side already sitting on three defeats after just 11 games. Stoke City swung the axe this time, as a cacophonous and hostile Britannia Stadium saw their heroes romp away to a 2 – 1 victory, while Wenger and his underpowered Gunners were left licking their wounds and complaining about the Potters physical approach.UEFA cup hopefuls Everton bagged their first home win of the season against a flat Fulham side, but once again left it very late, with new signing Louis Saha netting against his old club. The Toffees are up to seventh in the table now, having played pretty terribly all season so far, but maybe things are finally starting to fall into place for David Moyes’ men. Not a good week for the other teams realistically eying a top-6 finish however, as Aston Villa, Portsmouth and Manchester City flopped against supposedly-lower-grade opposition to continue their frustratingly uneven starts to the year. Controversy, as ever, surrounded Newcastle on Monday night, but they were more than worth their 2 – 0 win over Martin O’Neill’s fluctuating Villa. Portsmouth are in danger of self-destructing with Harry Redknapp’s departure, and in typically-awful conditions at Fratton Park, Wigan grabbed a last minute winner to steer them out of the relegation zone. Manchester City meanwhile can’t have any excuses for losing 2 – 0 to a scrappy Bolton side, as they really did not show up at the Reebok on Sunday. Maybe Robinho isn’t quite used to playing in freezing rain in front of 15,000 people quite yet. The last couple of games then saw a couple of competitive draws between some potential relegation fodder. Blackburn left it late to equalise against West Brom, with former MK Dons man Keith Andrews marking his Premier League debut with a goal to thank Paul Ince for his leap of faith. Finally, Middlesbrough and West Ham shared the points in a pretty entertaining match that saw Boro keeper Ross Turnbull pull off a fantastic double save at the death to deny first Lee Bowyer and then Jack Collison. Game of the Week – Tottenham vs LiverpoolOk, the Man United game had the goals, and the Stoke game had the upset, but for sheer can’t-take-your-eyes-off-it drama, White Hart Lane was the place to be this weekend as the worm perhaps finally started to turn for Spurs. The title-chasing Liverpool took the lead after just three minutes through Dirk Kuyt, and looked to be cruising as the two teams traded midfield blows, until just before the 70-minute mark Jamie Carragher bizarrely headed into his own net. In the very last minute of the game then, with a draw looking a decent enough result for Tottenham, Russian prodigy Roman Pavlyuchenko turned home Darren Bent's cross to cap a wonderful victory, and send the home crowd into the stratosphere.(Almost) Comeback of the Week – HullIt’s rare that any team scores three at Old Trafford; in fact, the last side I remember doing it was Real Madrid the year they won the Champions League. Christ, I never thought I’d be comparing Hull to the Galacticos, but it’s been that kind of season so far hasn’t it? Anyway, at 4 – 1 down the Hull players would’ve been well within their rights to just crawl up in a corner and wait for it to end, but the belief Phil Brown has installed in them is admirable to say the least. Shock goals from Mendy and Geovanni set up an entertaining finish, but even in defeat this was far from a disgrace against the best team in Europe™. Player of the Week – Rory DelapSay what you want about Stoke and their tactics, but ultimately the history books will show that they beat Arsenal. What people have to understand is that, to survive, all teams must play to their strengths, and if you had a weapon like Delap’s throw in your locker then you’d be mad to not use it. To call him just a catapult does Delap a real disservice though, and anyone who watched the extended highlights over the weekend will realize that he, and Stoke as a whole, can actually play football too. On Saturday, he not only set-up both goals, but he was literally everywhere for 95 minutes, crowding the Arsenal midfield in possession and distributing the ball with class.Here’s a nice and smug Stoke-compiled selection of Delap’s exploits this season to date then:Goal of the Week – Ishmael MillerDifficult one this weekend as no-one really scored anything outstanding, but for sheer individual skill the honour goes to West Brom forward Ishmael Miller for his side’s second against Blackburn. Gathering the ball on the edge of the box, he expertly turned his defender before smashing home a pin-point strike into the far corner past Paul Robinson.Worst Goal of the Week – Seyi OlofinjanaWe’re not trying to pick on Arsenal, but for sheer comedy, Stoke’s second is surely worthy of comment. Coming from (once again) one of those long-throws, Nigerian international Olofinjana seemed to sort of fall into Ryan Shawcross’ flick-on, half heading it and half chesting it through Almunia’s legs. As a wise man once said though: they all count.Whinge of the Week – Arsene WengerWho else but the Emperor of Excuses, ‘Doctor’ Wenger. Rather than accept defeat and move on, he once again reeled out his usual barrel of finger-pointing and blinkered unacceptance. Unfortunately, it's exactly this level of ungracious whinging that turns everyone else in the country against Arsenal, despite the beauty of their passing football:“Do you think Delap tried to play the ball when he tackled Walcott? Or that Shawcross tried to play the ball when he tackled Adebayor off the pitch?“All I can say is they (Arsenal) are brave and, for me, you need to have more courage to play football when you know that someone is tackling you from behind without any intention to play the ball.“If other teams are physical we can deal with that. We have just got to think of our own game and the way we play. If teams want to kick us we will deal with that and still come out on top. We will have to stick our foot in and tackle and then play our football when we have the ball.”Stoke defender Andy Wilkinson offered this succinct rebuttal: “It’s probably sour grapes from Arsenal. If they can’t deal with the intimidating atmosphere and the way we play, that’s their problem, not ours.” Accolade of the Week – Frank Lampard / Emile HeskeyThese two chaps take a lot of stick, not just from STT but from the whole country if we’re honest. However, Frank Lampard and Emile Heskey both grabbed their 100th league career goals this weekend, and it is certainly a milestone for each worth celebrating.Lampard did it with a header against Sunderland, which only confirmed his wonderful goal-scoring talents from midfield. Despite the mockery we dished out last season, it seems that this year Frank has remembered how to play, and has been instrumental alongside the magical Deco in Chelsea’s success, and also (whisper it) rising popularity. Take nothing away from Heskey though, because he might not get 20 a season like some strikers, but he’s more than worth his place in virtually any team because of the work he does off the ball, the space he creates for other players. Just ask Michael Owen and Wayne Rooney.Posted bychalovesmonkeysat8:09 AM0commentsLabels:long throws,pesky pesky emile heskey,STT awards,weekly roundup,Wenger's Weekly EmailOlder PostsSubscribe to:Posts (Atom)Paul Scholes's Ballbag combining football with lolcats Results 11/11/2008 Arsenal 2 – 1 Manchester United Aston Villa 1 – 2 Middlesbrough Blackburn 0 – 2 Chelsea Fulham 2 – 1 Newcastle Hull 0 – 1 Bolton Liverpool 3 – 0 West Brom Manchester City 1 – 2 Tottenham Sunderland 1 – 2 Portsmouth West Ham 1 – 3 Everton Wigan 0 – 0 StokeSoccerPro Awards Winner That's right2007 Soccerlens Awards 'STT is easily the best new blog started in 2007' - Editor, SoccerlensChant of the Week "David Bentley...are you listening,Can you see...what you are missing,Bottom of the league,With no Champions League,Walking in an Incey wonderland." Sung by Blackburn fans at Bolton If you're interested in sniffing stuff other than the line, you might want to try sniffing an Arsenal jersey or a pair of Adidas predator boots from SoccerPro.com.Better blogsAdidas F30.8 Indoor Soccer ShoeAlbion RoadAll In WhiteBlack and White and Read all OverbollocksCentre Holds ItDub StepsEnglish Premier LeagueFantasy Football GuruFootball is not my GodFootball Transfer NewsI Dislike Your Favourite Teamjust like my dreamsleftbackLiquid footballLive Cricket ScoresLive Football OnlineLolhanLoljockslolmascotsmy c-u-n-t elevenOle OleOn the BenchPremier Fantasy LeaguePremiership GlorySleep FootballSoccer ArtSoccer PieSoccer Prosesoccer shoesSoccer Training GuideSoccerPro.comSome People are on the Pitchthe cannonThe Definitive Word Off the PitchThe Onion BagThe Rabblers - Dulwich HamletThe Red CauldronThe SpoilerThis is Extra Timetwo hundred percentWatch Live Football OnlineWatch Live Premiership Football HereWick to WembleyWith LeatherBlog Archive▼ 2008(422)▼ November(11)The Shoes Maketh the ManMake-a-Wish FoundationWarning: Contains a Tenuous Analogy“But He Called My Son a Nonce!”Coining It InThe Gamest LadGameweek 12 – MisanthropePointed StickWhii Amii, Whii??Gameweek 11 – The FallenHe Drinks, He Drives, He Spits in People’s Eyes ► October(23)Gameweek 9 and 10 – DuplexBack in the GameGreat TimingWill the Real Ronaldo Please Stand Up?Get Your Tits Out for Carew!Wipe-Clean Cover IncludedBack to SchoolEsta Es Inglaterra!African Football in non-Violence / Corruption / De...Gameweek 8 – ‘Nothing but a Big Butt and a Smile’Round the BendFishing for MenKop that ShitResistable TalentLoos-erNever Mind the Ballacks (sigh)Wick to Wembley: The Book!Another Not Nice ManSome Much Needed InsightWembley ChroniclesVital Nereida Gallardo UpdateSwear-you-likeIt Should Be a National Holiday ► September(18)Gameweek 6 – Back Once Again for the Renegade Mast...One Manny ArmyVeritasThe Iron CurtainBenchmarkFlip BackAn Oasis in the ShitThe FallTiny TimmsNaughty South American of the Week UnoGeniusHead in the CloudsThe Saga ContinuesShopping ListWelcome to the ZuckMoney Talks ► August(40) ► July(48) ► June(36) ► May(43) ► April(52) ► March(52) ► February(58) ► January(41) ► 2007(138) ► December(28) ► November(31) ► October(29) ► September(22) ► August(28)Contact STTComments? 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expr:src\75\47data:sourceUrl\47 expr:width\75\47data:width\47/\76\n\74/a\76\n\74b:else\76\74/b:else\76\n\74img expr:alt\75\47data:title\47 expr:height\75\47data:height\47 expr:id\75\47data:widget.instanceId + \46quot;_img\46quot;\47 expr:src\75\47data:sourceUrl\47 expr:width\75\47data:width\47/\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74br/\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:caption !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74span class\75\47caption\47\76\74data:caption\76\74/data:caption\76\74/span\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74/div\76\n\74b:include name\75\47quickedit\47\76\74/b:include\076'}}, document.getElementById('Image3'), {'resize': true}, 'displayModeFull'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_ImageView', new _WidgetInfo('Image2', 'sidebar',{'main': {'varName': '', 'template': '\74b:if cond\75\47data:title !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74h2\76\74data:title\76\74/data:title\76\74/h2\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74div class\75\47widget-content\47\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:link !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74a expr:href\75\47data:link\47\76\n\74img expr:alt\75\47data:title\47 expr:height\75\47data:height\47 expr:id\75\47data:widget.instanceId + \46quot;_img\46quot;\47 expr:src\75\47data:sourceUrl\47 expr:width\75\47data:width\47/\76\n\74/a\76\n\74b:else\76\74/b:else\76\n\74img expr:alt\75\47data:title\47 expr:height\75\47data:height\47 expr:id\75\47data:widget.instanceId + \46quot;_img\46quot;\47 expr:src\75\47data:sourceUrl\47 expr:width\75\47data:width\47/\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74br/\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:caption !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74span class\75\47caption\47\76\74data:caption\76\74/data:caption\76\74/span\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74/div\76\n\74b:include name\75\47quickedit\47\76\74/b:include\076'}}, document.getElementById('Image2'), {'resize': false}, 'displayModeFull'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_TextView', new _WidgetInfo('Text3', 'sidebar',{'main': {'varName': '', 'template': '\74b:if cond\75\47data:title !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74h2 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class\75\47widget-content\47\76\n\74ul\76\n\74b:loop values\75\47data:links\47 var\75\47link\47\76\n\74li\76\74a expr:href\75\47data:link.target\47\76\74data:link.name\76\74/data:link.name\76\74/a\76\74/li\76\n\74/b:loop\76\n\74/ul\76\n\74b:include name\75\47quickedit\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/div\076'}}, document.getElementById('LinkList1'), {}, 'displayModeFull'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_BlogArchiveView', new _WidgetInfo('BlogArchive1', 'sidebar',{'main': {'varName': '', 'template': '\74b:if cond\75\47data:title\47\76\n\74h2\76\74data:title\76\74/data:title\76\74/h2\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74div class\75\47widget-content\47\76\n\74div id\75\47ArchiveList\47\76\n\74div expr:id\75\47data:widget.instanceId + \46quot;_ArchiveList\46quot;\47\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:style \75\75 \46quot;HIERARCHY\46quot;\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47data\47 name\75\47interval\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:style \75\75 \46quot;FLAT\46quot;\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47data\47 name\75\47flat\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:style \75\75 \46quot;MENU\46quot;\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47data\47 name\75\47menu\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74/div\76\n\74/div\76\n\74b:include name\75\47quickedit\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/div\076'}, 'flat': {'varName': 'data', 'template': '\74ul\76\n\74b:loop values\75\47data:data\47 var\75\47i\47\76\n\74li class\75\47archivedate\47\76\n\74a expr:href\75\47data:i.url\47\76\74data:i.name\76\74/data:i.name\76\74/a\76 (\74data:i.post-count\76\74/data:i.post-count\76)\n \74/li\76\n\74/b:loop\76\n\74/ul\076'}, 'menu': {'varName': 'data', 'template': '\74select expr:id\75\47data:widget.instanceId + \46quot;_ArchiveMenu\46quot;\47\76\n\74option value\75\47\47\76\74data:title\76\74/data:title\76\74/option\76\n\74b:loop values\75\47data:data\47 var\75\47i\47\76\n\74option expr:value\75\47data:i.url\47\76\74data:i.name\76\74/data:i.name\76 (\74data:i.post-count\76\74/data:i.post-count\76)\74/option\76\n\74/b:loop\76\n\74/select\076'}, 'interval': {'varName': 'intervalData', 'template': '\74b:loop values\75\47data:intervalData\47 var\75\47i\47\76\n\74ul\76\n\74li expr:class\75\47\46quot;archivedate \46quot; + data:i.expclass\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47i\47 name\75\47toggle\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74a class\75\47post-count-link\47 expr:href\75\47data:i.url\47\76\74data:i.name\76\74/data:i.name\76\74/a\76\n\74span class\75\47post-count\47 dir\75\47ltr\47\76(\74data:i.post-count\76\74/data:i.post-count\76)\74/span\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:i.data\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47i.data\47 name\75\47interval\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:i.posts\47\76\n\74b:include data\75\47i.posts\47 name\75\47posts\47\76\74/b:include\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74/li\76\n\74/ul\76\n\74/b:loop\076'}, 'toggle': {'varName': 'interval', 'template': '\74b:if cond\75\47data:interval.toggleId\47\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:interval.expclass \75\75 \46quot;expanded\46quot;\47\76\n\74a class\75\47toggle\47 expr:href\75\47data:widget.actionUrl + \46quot;\46amp;action\75toggle\46quot; + \46quot;\46amp;dir\75close\46amp;toggle\75\46quot; + data:interval.toggleId + \46quot;\46amp;toggleopen\75\46quot; + data:toggleopen\47\76\n\74span class\75\47zippy toggle-open\47\76\46#9660; \74/span\76\n\74/a\76\n\74b:else\76\74/b:else\76\n\74a class\75\47toggle\47 expr:href\75\47data:widget.actionUrl + \46quot;\46amp;action\75toggle\46quot; + \46quot;\46amp;dir\75open\46amp;toggle\75\46quot; + data:interval.toggleId + \46quot;\46amp;toggleopen\75\46quot; + data:toggleopen\47\76\n\74span class\75\47zippy\47\76\n\74b:if cond\75\47data:blog.languageDirection \75\75 \46quot;rtl\46quot;\47\76\n \46#9668;\n \74b:else\76\74/b:else\76\n \46#9658;\n \74/b:if\76\n\74/span\76\n\74/a\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74/b:if\076'}, 'posts': {'varName': 'posts', 'template': '\74ul class\75\47posts\47\76\n\74b:loop values\75\47data:posts\47 var\75\47i\47\76\n\74li\76\74a expr:href\75\47data:i.url\47\76\74data:i.title\76\74/data:i.title\76\74/a\76\74/li\76\n\74/b:loop\76\n\74/ul\076'}}, document.getElementById('BlogArchive1'), {'languageDirection': 'ltr'}, 'displayModeFull'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_TextView', new _WidgetInfo('Text1', 'sidebar',{'main': {'varName': '', 'template': '\74b:if cond\75\47data:title !\75 \46quot;\46quot;\47\76\n\74h2 class\75\47title\47\76\74data:title\76\74/data:title\76\74/h2\76\n\74/b:if\76\n\74div class\75\47widget-content\47\76\n\74data:content\76\74/data:content\76\n\74/div\76\n\74b:include name\75\47quickedit\47\76\74/b:include\076'}}, document.getElementById('Text1'), {}, 'displayModeFull'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_HeaderView', new _WidgetInfo('Header1', 'header'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_NavbarView', new _WidgetInfo('Navbar1', 'navbar'));_WidgetManager._RegisterWidget('_BlogView', new _WidgetInfo('Blog1', 'main')); |
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