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| About site: http://www.deathmonkey.org/ |
Title: Motorsports/Motorcycle Racing/Moped and Scooter - Death Monkey A rally from Finland to Gibraltar on 50cc Honda Monkey mopeds. Includes photos and information.
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Death Monkey MC: Death Monkey 2006: The Ultimate Rally
The rally is now over. Bob and Joe arrived to Gibraltar at noon on July 17th.
AboutTeamRouteLinks
Death Monkey 2006: The Ultimate Rally
Have you ever wanted to feel free with motor between your thighs and wind blowing to your face, while you are driving through the most beautiful part of Germany? Have you ever smuggled garden gnomes to France? Have you ever ridden Skyteam Monkey? 2006 summer the toughest rallye ever will be ridden from Helsinki to Gibraltar. 3500km.
Have you ever wanted to be a part of something epic?
Read more...
Stories from the road
The trip was completed in 17 days, with Bob and Joe arriving to Gibraltar on July 17th 2006. Lots of material is online.
The preparations in June 2006
The trip itself, 5000 kilometers on Skyteam Monkeys
Trip photos on Flickr
Latest Monkey blogs
Bob: Load of Death Monkey 2006 photos on Flickr
Posted on 2006-09-02 16:00:25 EEST in N 36° 8.000, W 5° 21.000. 0 comments.
A number of photos from the trip have been uploaded to Flickr. Here are some examples:        Browse the "Death Monkey 2006" gallery Watch the slideshow
Joe: Two weeks after
Posted on 2006-08-06 20:26:29 EEST in N 36° 8.000, W 5° 21.000. 1 comments.
It isn't easy to be a supermodel.
Or so we can presume, although still lacking the actual experience. I decided to give some thought to the Death Monkey project as a whole and sort it out here, as I've sorted it out in my head. Two weeks after finishing the rally some of its effects are still visible. Most notable on my personal habitus is the so called "drunken tanning", which means that while my forearms, shins and even face are relatively well tanned, rest of me is as white as Santa on having hangover day after Christmas.
So every time I go to shower or admire my naked, sometimes oiled, body from the mirror, small voice starts asking questions like "What happened your summer holiday?" or "Why didn't you get laid more often?" or "Did you realise that you spent all your money on this ridiculous trip while you could have been drinking and whoring all summer, you miserable cunt?". When that voice wakes up somewhere deep inside of me, the conscious part of my mind reminds that it is great that my little voice is practically asthmatic after swallowing road dust all the way from Helsinki to Gibraltar.
Seriously it was a trip, which doesn't need any explaining afterwards. Although I really saw dreams about driving my monkey days after finishing our rally, there are still only two kinds of people. Cunts who will do the distance and cunts who don't. To those cunts who say "I'd really wanted to participate, BUT ..." I say: Fuck you. There are as many excuses as there are assholes. Everybody has one.
Bob and Skoll. Thank you both. It was an awesome ride and it wouldn't have been the same without you.
So what next? There are plenty of options where Suicide Surfers / Routa MC / Death Monkeys will go next. It might be Paska-G 2007 or roadtrip through South America with a white fucking cadillac or the legendary Mongol Rally from London to Ulan Bator. Who knows. Point is that we still have dreams and we are still ready to make them happen.
Thanks for everybody who followed our amok through Europe. You will hear about our next project. And you never know, maybe you guys don't have any excuses next time. But if you do, you'll still have to admit that
It isn't easy to be a supermodel.
Joe Suicide
El Presidente of Death Monkey MC
Skoll: Home, sweet home
Posted on 2006-07-17 22:02:58 EEST in N 60° 10.533, E 24° 56.050. 1 comments.
There isn't much to tell you about the rest of my trip. Saturday was spent merrily with Johnny and Larry-Boy sitting in a park, drinking sangria and waiting for the train. On Sunday morning in Barcelona I bid farewell to the guys and planned to spend the day walking around the city. After two hours I gave up - the heat was unbearable. So I went to the airport and read the book I had taken with me (Neil Gaiman's "American Gods").Back in Finland the first kilometers on my Triumph felt very weird. Even sitting on the bike and lifting it from the sidestand it felt increadably heavy and big. And I really had to be careful not to use throttle the same way I was used to use with the Monkey.The trip itself turned out to be a lot more fun that I had expected. Mainly because I had expected the driving position to be something between uncomfortable and outright hellish, while in reality there was no problem at all. After 2 weeks and 3500 km the only sore muscles I got are from the previous two nights which were sent in a train and on the airport floor. Baggage capacity was also sufficient for our needs (I hade one full backpack which included a jacket, 1 litre of oil, some chain lube and tools).Obviously the fact that I didn't make it all the way to Gibraltar is a small disappointment. But for the me the point was being on the road, not getting to our goal. We had originally planned to spend two weeks on the trip and I got two weeks of driving so it's not that bad.A special thanks to our sponsors Motorpower in Tampere and Skyteam for provigind the bikes.Even though the trip was fun, it was also weary, so the next one will be something easier and shorter - maybe we'll take the subway to Vuosaari or the trolley through Helsinki.
Bob: Monkeys, meet Monkeys
Posted on 2006-07-17 17:45:04 EEST in N 36° 8.000, W 5° 21.000. 6 comments.
The morning ride from Ronda to Gibraltar was rewarded with a full english breakfast on the British soil.We spent a while wondering about my missing license plate, and then rode up The Rock to meet the last free monkeys of Europe and to give the final radio report.Now the rally is over.
Bob: Petrol Couriers of Andalucia
Posted on 2006-07-17 02:25:05 EEST in N 36° 44.000, W 5° 10.000. 0 comments.
We started in Avila at sunrise and finished 700km later almost at the gates of Gibraltar as all gas stations closed.If there has been a defining factor for the day, it has been Joe running out of fuel.As our pair of heroes has struggled on the plains of La Mancha against the windmill-like odds of reaching Gibraltar, just like another pair centuries earlier, the adventure always stalled at the some point, in our case: gasolino finito, engine stoppo.The cause for these distractions has been Joe's leaking tank, which finally reached the point of losing half litre of fuel per hour. Not only this made stops short, it also meant going from refilling every 150km to about every 80km. And obviously I've been hauling spare fuel for stranded Joe from all corners of the country.In any case we're resting the night in Ronda to arrive at Gibraltar in daylight.
Joe: Mission Impossible
Posted on 2006-07-16 22:40:06 EEST in N 38° 1.000, W 4° 23.000. 1 comments.
At this point it seems that no monkey would be able to reach Gibraltar alone. Skoll was the unluckiest of the bunch, forced to retire from the race by treacherous spaniards. Bob has managed to fuck his credit card and would be stuck here penniless without me.As for myself, my steed is currently burning gasolin at the rate of 4.5l/100km. Burning is misleading term since apprx. half of it is spent to rich the weak soil of Spain. Since the leak has become bigger, I'd probably be in the middle of Sierra Madre national park without Bob lending some gasolin.With more than 4800km with my monkey, this trip begins to look like huge amount of miscalculations and optimism. But what the hell, tomorrow I'll reach Gibraltar. Hopefully there will be a monkey parade.
Bob: Gaining your Monkey Butt
Posted on 2006-07-16 02:35:05 EEST in N 40° 39.000, W 4° 42.000. 26 comments.
After waving goodbyes to the Blue Monkey, the remaining duo sped south over the sunburnt hills of Spain.Gibraltar and the way home behind it gave wings to the monkeys and on the day more than 500km was travelled - possibly the longest ever day trip on a monkey.This feat has made us think about a Monkey Butt certification, similar to the Iron Butt certificates for long distance motorcyclists, but tailored for mopeds. We'll have to see what happens with that.The plan had been to cover 600 kilometers and halve the distance to Big G. However, the group got hit by a multitude of problems:First the magnetic stripe on my credit card died, severely deducting my payment abilities. Then all gas stations closed (no automats in Spain!) and Joe ran out of gas. And finally the traffic police turned us back from the dark road because Joe's lights weren't working.So now we're spending the night in the old town of Avila, the bikes stashed safely to the hotel bar.
Skoll: One flew over Monkey's nest
Posted on 2006-07-15 16:15:07 EEST in N 42° 49.012, W 1° 38.594. 0 comments.
Getting out of Pamplona was surprisingly easy. I guess most tourists left already yesterday. I got a train ticket to Barcelona for the night train and flight back to Helsinki for Monday morning.On a different note, the fireworks show yesterday was pretty impressive.
Skoll: Clockwork Monkey
Posted on 2006-07-15 12:40:07 EEST in N 42° 49.012, W 1° 38.594. 1 comments.
The moment you find somebody to connect with, somebody who understands you, somebody who you simply enjoy being with, they leave you. His name was propably Pablo or Juan. I'm sure he was tall and dark. Don't you understand that the only thing he has in mind is to ride you, have some fun, and then dump you like a broken toy. Still you left with him. Why?So in other words my Monkey was stolen. We had parked all three of them in the same place in front of a big hotel in Pamplona. This morning the Blue Monkey was gone. The only thing left of it was the ignition lock. Fuck. Propably some drunken idiots have taken it for a ride and dumped it when it run out of gas.Bob and Joe have rode on and here I am at the police station waiting to report the crime. The picture is from yesterday from the highest place in Pyrenees our path crossed (1073 m).
Bob: Mystery of the Missing Monkey
Posted on 2006-07-15 11:45:04 EEST in N 42° 49.012, W 1° 38.594. 0 comments.
We woke up this morning in order to start the race, only to find that the thieves of Pamplona had kept themselves busy: Skoll's monkey had been stolen after a failed attempt at stealing mine.The only thing remaining of the bike was the ignition lock lying in the gutter.Now Joe and I will start the ride to Gibraltar and Skoll will most likely fly home to revitalize his relationship with his Triumph.Beats having underwear stolen like happened on the previous trip to San Fermin.Older blog posts
Death Monkey 2006
What?
Longest rally with Skyteam Monkey 50cc "motorbikes". Ever. Bikes are small, but men will be big. A race for madmen. Or women, if they are crazy enough.
When?
Start is from Helsinki 30.6.2006. Winner will probably reach Gibraltar by 13th of july.
Where?
From Helsinki to Gibraltar. Each Monkey is on its own. Tales will be told of those who will fall.
Learn more!
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© 2006 Kuoleman Apinat Ry
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A | rally | from | Finland | to | Gibraltar | on | 50cc | Honda | Monkey | mopeds. | Includes | photos | and | information. |
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http://www.deathmonkey.org/
Death Monkey 2008 November
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dvd
A rally from Finland to Gibraltar on 50cc Honda Monkey mopeds. Includes photos and information.
Rules
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